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Jingle, Bell, Jingle & Bell LLP

Christmas wreath

Dear Mr Claus,

I write to set out my advice regarding a number of matters on which you have consulted our firm.

1. Elf employment dispute

You asked whether there was any legal way to prevent the newly formed “Don’t Shelve the Elves” organisation from holding their planned labour stoppage on December 22nd. As part of Finland Lapland must be considered to have become party to the European Convention on Human Rights on 5 May 1989. Under the Convention, Article 11 protects the right to freedom of association, which includes the right to form trade unions. Assuming the Elves have conducted a proper ballot of their members, I am afraid that the planned strike is legal and you may want to consider negotiating the dispute. I would be happy to negotiate on your behalf if so instructed.

2. Back injury suffered 24/12/2016

You told me that you had been suffering from back pain ever since tripping over a poorly situated fireguard when descending the chimney of 25 Acacia Avenue, Durham, England. As I informed you during our meeting, occupiers in England can be liable under the law of tort (civil wrongs). Assuming you were a lawful visitor (permission to descend the chimney being implied by the sherry and biscuits left for you by the homeowner) the Occupiers Liability Act 1957 would apply and on the facts given I would suggest there are strong grounds for a claim. However, English law does impose a limitation period of 3 years from the date of injury in which to bring a claim, so unfortunately you may find it difficult to commence proceedings.

3. Naughty/nice lists (legitimate expectation)

I can reassure you that permission has been denied for a judicial review of your decision to class Timothy Grendall as being on the ‘naughty’ rather than ‘nice’ list. The court were impressed by your diligently checking all lists twice and agreed that there was no procedural impropriety, despite Master Grendall’s claim that he saw his mother bestowing an affectionate kiss upon yourself.

4. Incident on 24th December 2019

Sadly the South Midlands Police have referred this matter to the Crown Prosecution Service, who will now decide whether to prosecute the case. I am confident that the Road Traffic Act 1988 will not apply in the circumstances, as you were not in charge of a motor vehicle, but unfortunately a sleigh would be considered a “carriage” and pursuant to Section 12 of the Licensing Act 1872 it is an offence to be in charge of any carriage, horse or cattle when drunk. I appreciate that Mr Rudolph and his fellows object to the term “cattle” but it will be for a judge to decide if this term includes reindeer.

I appreciate that this is a very busy time of year for you but I am of course available to discuss any of these issues at greater length at your convenience.

Yours merrily,

Christopher Jingle

Senior Partner

Jingle, Bell, Jingle & Bell LLP

 

Francine Ryan Fred Motson

Fred Motson recently joined the Open University as a Lecturer in Law in 2020

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